INDIA UPDATE

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“I WAS IRRIGATING SWITZERLAND,” EXPLAINS AJIT PAWAR


In a move described as ‘the most significant advance in Indo-Swiss relations since Toblerone’, Maharashtra Irrigation Minister Ajit Pawar has explained that steps to improve irrigation by his department over the last five years were mainly conducted in Switzerland.

Mr. Pawar is a leading member of the Pawar family, famous for wearing underwear made entirely out of currency notes. He has resigned after the Maharashtra government announced that it would be publishing a white paper on irrigation. “He thought it would be blank,” said an aide. “He was furious when we explained that it would have actual writing in it.”

According to news reports, despite spending over 85 billion yuan* on irrigation in the last five years, the total area under irrigation in Maharashtra has increased by 0.01%. The analyst who produced these figures has fled to the US, where he is likely to be adopted by Angelina Jolie.

Swiss authorities have welcomed the move. “Mr. Pawar is one of our biggest benefactors,” they said, “He wanted to keep his charitable acts anonymous, but it was becoming hard to hide the evidence. His support in the area of irrigation is the reason why we have so many lakes.”

*Due to increasing international readership, India Update will now be converting all sums of money into international currency.

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15 comments on ““I WAS IRRIGATING SWITZERLAND,” EXPLAINS AJIT PAWAR

  1. Barb Drummond
    September 26, 2012

    Maybe he should try the Netherlands. I think they could use some help with their irrigation too.

  2. n
    September 26, 2012

    Two yuan get us into horse races?

  3. surindernath
    September 26, 2012

    Gupt daan maha daan.

    Silent donation is the best donation. The Swiss didn’t know and we 135 crore Indians didn’t know. I appreciate Mr. Powar’s (or Putwaters’) silencers. Must be imported – Italy made ?

    • shovonc
      September 26, 2012

      As you can see, Italy is just across the border.

      • surindernath
        September 26, 2012

        See, I knew that !! I bet Dr. SMS’s ears and eyes are also from the same manufacturer !!

  4. umashankar
    September 26, 2012

    Angelina Jolie will do all of us a huge favour if she adopted Pawar himself! Hope she returns those undergarments to the poor citizens of India! :D

  5. inducares
    September 26, 2012

    We should not blame Pawar-one can irrigate only one area at a time!The Swiss have a lot to thank us for.

  6. SUDIPTA (PIKU) ROY
    September 26, 2012

    This one is a classic masterpeice… full or “pawar” and no “brawn”…!!!

  7. Vinay Prajapati
    September 26, 2012

    ha ha

  8. Rajesh
    September 27, 2012

    So he improved irrigation in Switzerland.

  9. Wow Shovon! Another fantastic post. Angelina Jolie seems to have a mighty heart. :)
    Why yuan as currency of choice?

    Swiss authorities were referring to the elder “Mr. Pawar” or the relatively younger nephew of his? :D

  10. butimbeautiful
    September 28, 2012

    Who wouldn’t want to be adopted by Angelina!

  11. Pingback: AJIT PAWAR TO PERSONALLY IRRIGATE MAHARASHTRA | INDIA UPDATE

  12. Pingback: AJIT PAWAR TO PERSONALLY IRRIGATE MAHARASHTRA | INDIA UPDATE

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This entry was posted on September 26, 2012 by in BREAKING NEWS!! and tagged , , , , , , , .

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