Many physicists today postulate the existence of multiple universes, even when sober. We used to live in a world of infinite possibilities. Now we live in an infinite number of worlds. India shines. Democracy thrives. The economy booms. A hundred flyovers bloom. This is not that India. If you see your picture here one day, don’t worry. That’s not you.
Residents of drought stricken Aurangabad rejoiced today, after prompt action by the government saved a local leader from death by starvation. Opposition heavyweight Gopinath Munde has been on indefinite hunger strike for the past 24 hours, demanding drought relief action by the government. Alarmed by his rapidly deteriorating health, the government swiftly despatched NCP leader Patangrao Kadam to reassure him. Despite short notice, the local administration managed to divert emergency relief tankers just in time. These tankers delivered 1000 litres of water to construct an emergency helipad.
“The water was required to prevent dust from flying,” explained an aide to the minister. “Minister Kadam only wears white. To express sympathy for farmers, he is not washing his clothes. Hence additional precaution was required.”
Satisfied by the government gesture, Mr Munde has called off his fast, after sipping a glass of sugarcane juice, followed by a glass of Pune wine. However, he remains slightly upset.
“It would have been more respectful if he had brought Angeline Jolie,” he said.