SHARAD PAWAR DENIES BUYING PAPUA NEW GUINEA

In news that has triggered massive celebrations across the Pacific Rim, Agriculture Minister Sharad Pawar has denied that the government has hiked the price of cooking gas so that he can purchase Papua New Guinea.

“When there is good Maharashtra land still available, why should I be putting your money in other places?” he asked. “However if they have any kind of agricultural produce which they wish to sell at unusually high prices, I am always available for consultation.”

Real estate experts have expressed surprise at his statement.

“As far as we know,” said one, “He already owns most of Maharashtra. It all depends on what he means by ‘good land’. He may be referring to the Arabian Sea. Alternately, perhaps he is confused, and is buying from himself. This is the problem when you use different names. As time goes by, it becomes hard to keep track. He’s been looking slightly exhausted recently. This could be because he’s been negotiating too hard with himself.”