INDIA UPDATE

Many physicists today postulate the existence of multiple universes, even when sober. We used to live in a world of infinite possibilities. Now we live in an infinite number of worlds. India shines. Democracy thrives. The economy booms. A hundred flyovers bloom. This is not that India. If you see your picture here one day, don’t worry. That’s not you.

MONEY WAS DONATED TO ‘BARFI’, EXPLAINS KHURSHID


Disabled people in India rejoiced after learning that money received on their behalf had, in fact, been donated. Union Law Minister Salman Khurshid revealed that money received by his foundation was used to support ‘Barfi’, a film about the disabled.

“Funds are limited, and we cannot help all the disabled simultaneously,” said Mr. Khurshid, “First, we are assisting the high people, after which, guttersnipes, and eventually, if time permits, third class people.”

Funds are being deployed on a case-to-case basis. “Ranbir Kapoor received acting lessons,” said Khurshid. “Priyanka Chopra received singing lessons. Director Anurag Basu has received extensive therapy designed to stimulate original thinking.”

Subject to further handouts from the government, the foundation has a packed schedule in 2013. Planned activities include interventions in anger management for Mamta Banerjee, speech therapy for Manmohan Singh, kleptomania for Sharad Pawar, and sexual abstinence for N.D. Tiwari. Mental health professionals have lauded the move, although they remain doubtful about Mr. Pawar.

Foundation Director Mrs. Louise Khurshid will also be receiving treatment for her own disability, which has been causing friction in her married life.

“I’m simply unable to forge signatures properly,” she revealed.

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23 comments on “MONEY WAS DONATED TO ‘BARFI’, EXPLAINS KHURSHID

  1. neelkanth
    October 14, 2012

    Very nicely said.

  2. RAJKRISHNAN NAIR
    October 14, 2012

    Just great..

  3. anupam patra
    October 14, 2012

    Shoot – reload – shoot.

    keep going Shovon

  4. mjreynoldsblog
    October 14, 2012

    I don’t even know who all these people are and I still laughed. Good job!

  5. ZinalBhadra
    October 15, 2012

    hahaha.. ROFL

  6. iamalexwyler
    October 15, 2012

    “Even more good” people are always at first positions, and all other “standart 3rd class” at the end of a row.

  7. Ghazala Hossain
    October 15, 2012

    OMG..! too moch 😀

  8. Indriyajit Sethi
    October 15, 2012

    Shovon, for once I must disagree with you. Its baffles my (third class, unoriginal aka Anurag Basu) imagination that a scam in 2012 that too by a Congress minister, is worth 70 lacs? 70 lacs! Come on, don’t drag him down to the level of an mba! pls dont take that last comment personally 😉

    • shovonc
      October 15, 2012

      Hi! I would never take anything you say about MBAs personally.

    • TK Pradhan
      October 16, 2012

      Sethi, would you say No to a 70,000/= Cheque by your Company for lets say “Good Performance”. 70,000 for you is same as 70 Lacs for Salman Bhai.

  9. Barb Drummond
    October 15, 2012

    Or maybe they could buy some cake for them to eat!

  10. Dileep Deshpande
    October 15, 2012

    Very well said, perhaps, humour is the only way we can hit back even as they continue to loot our country.

  11. Joydeep
    October 15, 2012

    Shovon, this is too good! And even before ink has dried on Indriyajit ‘AirIndia’ Sethi’s comments, our beloved Feni Fasad Farma tells us the difference between an mba and a minister….it is only a multiple of 100.

  12. ilakshee
    October 16, 2012

    Yes..thats where all the money has gone! And we accuse them without checking the facts!!! Enjoyed your post 🙂

  13. gayatri soni
    October 16, 2012

    Mr. khurshid would have got some relief with this article. Lol! 🙂

  14. panchali
    October 16, 2012

    Oh, so many are at the top of the crazy chain,…!! I pity the Mental health professionals …:))

  15. ritu
    October 16, 2012

    Perfect expose, Shovon…enjoyed!

  16. TK Pradhan
    October 16, 2012

    Sarcasm at its Hilarious Best. Good One, Shovon. One must say that in 24 years (since 1988) your Humor has increased exponentially (to the power of 24). 😉

    • shovonc
      October 17, 2012

      Hi, TK! Good to hear from you. Imagine how powerful I’ll be in another 24 years!

      • TK Pradhan
        October 17, 2012

        Yes. One should not underestimate the power of satire & when mixed with humor like yours its nuclearly explosive. By the way what do you feed the Right side of your brain, to create thses masterpieces!! & not to forget that your humor increases exponentially per year but Rober(t)’s Wealth increases exponentially every week. What is better you decide. 🙂

  17. Micky Fernandez
    October 17, 2012

    Do not forget that the police need extensive training in writing, as they are currently incapable of writing an FIR.

  18. NM
    October 19, 2012

    This was amazing!!! So funny!! Yes, it does seem like the funds were deployed to help the “poor people” who have the task of ruining oops running this country!!!

    Wonderfully written!! Cheers!!

  19. Rhino House
    October 23, 2012

    I laughed too much.

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