Many physicists today postulate the existence of multiple universes, even when sober. We used to live in a world of infinite possibilities. Now we live in an infinite number of worlds. India shines. Democracy thrives. The economy booms. A hundred flyovers bloom. This is not that India. If you see your picture here one day, don’t worry. That’s not you.



In news that has been condemned by the Delhi Gymkhana, the Indian government has announced that it will be charging the British government arrears in rent and visa fees for overstaying till 1947. Calculations will be done on a per head per year basis, beginning in the early 17th century.

“We will be charging extra for Lord Mountbatten,” said a government spokesperson, “Since he stayed till 1948.”

This move was in reaction to an announcement that all Indians entering the UK will now have to pay a bond of 3000 pounds, leaving them little or no money for shopping. Instead, the British government will refund the money on departure, so that they can spend it back in India.

Moving swiftly, the Indian government has arrested prominent Britons Mark Tully and Katrina Kaif, prior to deportation for non-payment.

“In order to cause minimum inconvenience, I offered to share a cell with Ms. Kaif,” said Mr. Tully, “But they refused me.”

In other retaliatory measures, described by some analysts as ‘draconian’, Doordarshan newscasters will now speak in American accents, the Indian Army will no longer play bagpipes, and Union Law Minister Kapil Sibal is being presented an award for ‘Excellence in English Poetry’. The government has also demanded the immediate return of the Kohinoor Diamond, Art Malik, and the entire North West Wing of the British Museum.

British PM David Cameron has reacted strongly.

“As soon as we figure out what the visa rules are,” he said, “We will give a befitting reply.”


  1. rakhie
    July 4, 2013

    Bankrupt country Britz now back to same ” looting” , & conspiracy, divide & rule bussiness,.The 21st Century Indian r aware of this tactics played by them , so better luck elsewhere.,

  2. Jay
    July 5, 2013

    Not sure whether any of the above commentators read the news in detail!! This is distorted fact!. The goverment said thatonly the ‘HIGH RISK’ immigrants ?Indians will be asked to sign the bond and NOT everyone. This ‘High Risk’ group is only a handful. So I am amazed at the reaction and the childish behaviour of the Indian Goverment. I am an Indian immigrant myself and at times cringe at the number of illegal immigrants (including students who go to fake colleges and work in cash in hand places) who manage to somehow work their way to staying in UK. I do think that the UK government is right in bringing in this new policy because it our hard earned money that we are spending on the illegals. All skilled immigrants who have come here legitimately are always welcome no no bonds to sign.

  3. Rivenrod
    July 10, 2013

    Priceless . . .


  4. Ganesh
    August 21, 2013

    Halloa! The last I heard was that the British Government panicked and called for an extraordinary meeting of the parliament when they heard that INDIA may be returned to them!!

  5. Abdul
    September 16, 2013

    Wow ! what a bold step.I like the idea of charging Britishers who not only ruled by force by disrupted our culture & heritage.In returned what they gave us discrimination,hatred & corruption etc.

  6. Raj
    October 9, 2013

    Actually I welcome the UK bond and think the Indian reaction is silly. Many Indians from wealthy families or with high incomes have no problem getting visa’s and visiting the UK and spending 1000’s in Mayfair. As a lower middle class Brit-Indian, I recognize that we also have a lot of illegal Indians in this country. But I always felt it unfair that my relatives in India can not visit me while rich Indians come and go. My relatives have been were denied tourist visa’s for 25 years! because they are not rich, live in villages and are not 100% literate and on paper are a risk to overstay their visa. This bond will allow me to put money on the table so my less educated relatives can now visit. 3000 pounds is not a huge deposit to secure the right to have your family come visit. These are relatives I love and would like for me to visit before they pass away.

    The bond does not limit the snobby Indians who currently travel to the UK. From what I understand it will grow the pool so more regular people can visit. So what seems like unfair policy is actually quite generous and better than the US.

  7. Pingback: India To Charge BritainOn Per Head Basis For Over Staying In India Till 1947 – KanyiDaily

  8. Pingback: INDIA TO CH – fernkaseesampmac

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This entry was posted on June 26, 2013 by in BREAKING NEWS!! and tagged , , , , .

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