Many physicists today postulate the existence of multiple universes, even when sober. We used to live in a world of infinite possibilities. Now we live in an infinite number of worlds. India shines. Democracy thrives. The economy booms. A hundred flyovers bloom. This is not that India. If you see your picture here one day, don’t worry. That’s not you.
In what has been described as ‘crippling blow to relief coverage’, a local politician from Bulandshahr was fatally injured while flagging off a train filled with relief material for Uttarkhand.
“He was being photographed from all sides,” said a weeping party worker, “Then the media people said, sir, pose once in front of the train also. Someone put up a banner and said ‘Chalo’. The driver thought it was an instruction to him. The train started moving, We did not want to disturb Netaji, as he was in the middle of a speech. At the last minute, he tried to escape, but he fell, and his head was crushed.”
Despite the lack of a head, the local strongman continues to function. He is now communicating through written notes. In one of them he wrote, “Nothing will change. I will continue to serve voters with just as much dedication and devotion as before.”
Sources reveal that the leader will face problems in the area of foreign travel, after his application for passport renewal was rejected, citing ‘absence of passport photo’. A local rival has welcomed the development. “Now he will stop poking his nose into everything,” he said. The leader himself is reportedly pleased, as he will no longer have to spend a fortune on breath mints and after-shave.
Unfortunately, his own party is not fully convinced. “We do not want to be accused of victimising the disabled,” said a spokesperson, “But if there is a voice vote in the Lok Sabha, there could be a problem.”