INDIA UPDATE

Many physicists today postulate the existence of multiple universes, even when sober. We used to live in a world of infinite possibilities. Now we live in an infinite number of worlds. India shines. Democracy thrives. The economy booms. A hundred flyovers bloom. This is not that India. If you see your picture here one day, don’t worry. That’s not you.

KNOW YOUR LAWS : Section 66A, Information Technology Act


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The Information Technology Act was put together after the Government of India discovered the internets in the year 2000. They had suspected its existence for some time, but it was confirmed after a special task force was sent to the UK to study Sir Timothy Berners-Lee. Not wishing to fall behind China, the Indian government then quickly put together a law to guide citizens in cyber space. Since the law was put together in a hurry, the language is slightly loose, and suggests that  causing ‘annoyance’ or ‘inconvenience’ could be major crimes.

In a recent interview, noted poet and Union Minister Kapil Sibal, who looks for cartoons of Sonia Gandhi in his spare time, said that ‘we would have to see the law in action to understand whether it was working or not’. Based on the evidence so far, this is what we can see :

1) No one can pretend to be Manmohan Singh, except Manmohan Singh.

2) If a suspected rapist is a minister, and lives in Kerala, he should be treated with the utmost sensitivity. Offenders will be subjected to love sonnets by Shashi Tharoor.

3) No type of Chidambaran should be mentioned.

4) Jokes about Mamata Banerjee should not be made, however funny they may seem at the time (whether online or offline, this is generally inadvisable)

5) It is positively forbidden to suggest that anyone in Bombay is scared of being attacked by the Shiv Sena. Failure to comply could lead to attacks by the Shiv Sena.

6) In general, this law has seen widespread use in the state of Maharashtra, most notably in the case of two Air India employees who were jailed for 12 days for inconveniencing the NCP, a wholly owned subsidiary of Sharad Pawar.

Has the government taken any action post these arrests? We are pleased to report that it has. As per an order issued in January, the police cannot arrest anybody without authorization from an Inspector-General. This means that we should not mock people who have Inspector-Generals on speed dial (e.g. Karti Chidambaran).

The other common factor in each of the above events is that the victims are all VIPs. The government will shortly be issuing a list of VIPs who should not be annoyed, as a guideline for the public. A list of approved tweets is also being generated. While it is yet to be released, our sources are able to confirm that, post scrutiny by the competent authority, three of the approved messages are as follows :

  • Don’t be bitter on Twitters
  • Vote Karti Chidambaran for sexiest man alive!
  • If I could just push my way through the crowd, I too, would kiss Sonia Gandhi’s feet.

In sum, while the actual nature of this crime is yet to be defined, there is no doubt that it is a grave one. The maximum penalty is three years, compared to two years for causing death due to negligence. This means that annoying Karti Chidambaran is 50% more heinous than causing the death of an ordinary human being, such as you. The next time you feel the urge to be funny at his expense, we recommend that you write it down on a small slip of paper and pass it around. This is much safer than Facebook or Twitter, and in cases of arrest, the evidence can always be swallowed.

10 comments on “KNOW YOUR LAWS : Section 66A, Information Technology Act

  1. neelkanth
    March 18, 2013

    USEFUL GUIDELINES.

  2. MEGHA SINGH CHAUHAN
    March 18, 2013

    A very informative blog I must say..!! 🙂

  3. yarnspinnerr
    March 18, 2013

    🙂

    Wonderfully explained. Kudos.

  4. Desi Traveler
    March 18, 2013

    noted poet…..? I can’t help laughing my #$% off…I like the idea of chit… should help the chit fund business..

  5. Indriyajit Sethi
    March 18, 2013

    but if you’re a member of Parliament you can uphold the Indian constitution even if you are a criminal and if you’re Italian you can go home for Xmas http://blogs.timesofindia.indiatimes.com/TheSiegeWithin/entry/falling-for-yet-another-comic-con

  6. Barb Drummond
    March 18, 2013

    All terrifyingly sensible. How many internets are there or aren’t we allowed to know?

  7. moderndayruth
    March 23, 2013

    “The government will shortly be issuing a list of VIPs who should not be annoyed, as a guideline for the public… ” BWHAHHAHH!!! I believe our guys dream of that too 😉 Oh and DITTO re. Don’t be bitter on Twitters! Once again, i just ADORE your blog!

  8. Rambler
    March 27, 2013

    I think the law has to be tightened – any one posting those vile messages on facebook and hurting the sentiments should be hanged…. Or at least be subjected to death by either of:
    • Listening to Sibal’s poem recitals
    • Hearing Renuka Chowdhary’s laughter
    • A Dance-Off with Sushma Swaraj

  9. vishalrathod76
    March 27, 2013

    Nice read
    Travel India

  10. Enjoyed it as always. I will remember the “don’t be bitter on twitter”.

    One should remember not to talk of giving a jadooo ki jhappi aka bear hug to behenji mayawati ji. Even Sanjay Dutt couldn’t give it. 🙂

    People these days are trying to control free speech, both offline as well as online. Tough times indeed.

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